“A sexy, laugh-out-loud love story about a woman trying to save her failing lingerie business with a new product “personal massagers” made to the specs of the spokesman of her choice! But when she falls for the first model she meets, how can she prove she’s his perfect fit?
With their business in trouble, Mia and Bryn must pull out all the stops to save their shop. Things get sticky when Mia, owner of Classy & Sassy Lingerie, has to go on five blind “dates” to find the right model for the big marketing plan that will save the store. But they aren’t your ordinary blind dates. Mia has to test out the goods to find the perfect “spokespenis” the model for Classy & Sassy’s newest line of lifelike dildos.
Not realizing Mia is on a mission, Oliver Christensen approaches her in a bar and Mia mistakes him for model #1. Oliver decides to play along. But just how far is he willing to take this charade in order to get closer to Mia? And what happens if Mia’s Blind Date #1 turns out to be The One?”
-Synopsis from Goodreads
Try Me On for Size is the first book in the Classy ‘n’ Sassy series written by Stephanie Haefner. Check it out on Goodreads.
| AVAILABLE NOW |
| Other books in the series |
| Size Matters (#2) – Bryn| One Size Fits All (#3) – Penny|
Mia Montanari seems to be going through a big rough patch in her life. Her lingerie store is going down in business.. by a lot. Her father won’t stop trying to control her life and work for his company, and her sister is on the same side as him. But with business going down and her best friend and business partner Bryn being a single widowed mother with her house on the line if the company fails, they need to start doing something new to bring up sales AND FAST.
The best bet for the company is a new line of products. Adult toys, but not just any adult toys replicas of real life men. And how do they find the men to do so? Well Bryn isn’t ready to sleep with another man since losing her husband, so Mia is the one to be the ultimate penis tester. Model agency’s are called and all Mia has to do is make sure they contestants are big enough and good enough to please the woman that come in the store for the dildos. Mia is supposed to sleep with all of them – well kinda you know just have the guys lay there and make sure the “product” is perfect for what they need. Plus the winner gets to be the spokesman for their store.
Oliver Christensen has his secrets and his past he’s trying to hide from. Seeing Mia at the bar seems like the perfect distraction he needs. Oliver just thinks Mia is stood up from a blind date, but has no idea what is about to really happen when they head back to her apartment.
Will Oliver be just the person Mia needs for the store, or maybe for her heart? Or will she find someone else with the other 4 contestants she is interview and penis testing? All I know is the secrets Oliver is hiding are quite big, and the drama and scandals just keep coming and coming between him, Mia and the girls store Sassy ‘n’ Classy. Maybe expanding the line isn’t the best thing… because along the way it just keeps expanding Mia’s heart and also stress.
I greatly enjoyed this book. Had the perfect mix of humor, drama and story line to keep me entertained and drawn in at all times. The contestants for the store are sexy and definitely well endowed. The awkwardness for Mia is perfectly written and also sprawled out through the book. The drama is never too much, and actually something that could happen in real life and you definitely won’t see the twist coming. Stephanie Haefner wonderful wrote a book that kept me wanting more and wondering when Mia will just finally get a break. Definitely adding the other two books in my TBR list!
Check out my review on Goodreads. Or take a look at my longer review below with all the spoilers
LONG REVIEW with Spoilers. SO SPOILER ALERT!!!
Mia Montanari and best friend Bryn own a lingerie shop together. After 8 years, sales have been going down hill and they need to figure out something to get their store out of the slump. Bryn comes up with a wonderful idea of having the store sell dildos as well. You know for those women that don’t have men to dress up in lingerie for. But they can’t be like the normal stores and just sell toys. So they decide to make the toys themselves. Except they need to make sure that the male model they will be using will work wonders to the female orgasm. Widowed Bryn is not ready to take up the challenge, so Mia is the one to do so. If not they could lose their company and that would mean best friend Bryn and Bryn’s kids could lose their home.
Mia can do this. The model agency already screened the guys and their sizes. Making sure they’re big enough for the challenge and clean of STD’s and such. So all Mia has to do is bring the guy home, and have her way with him. The man is supposed to just lay there and do nothing while Mia makes sure at every angle the size and girth work out for what they need. Plus when she meets them up at the bar she will have small conversations. Just to make sure he would be a good fit for the spokesman of their company. The winner not only gets to have a bunch of molds made of his special member, but also he will be coming in the meet woman and do promos. So the lucky gentleman winner needs to sweep those lonely woman off their feet.
“Date” #1 is supposed to be a guy named Ryan. Mia’s nerves are through the roof, especially when the guy is 20 mins late. So when a guy comes up talking to her she just assumes it’s Ryan. Except it’s not. Oliver Christensen can’t help but be pulled into Mia at the bar, so he goes over to her not expecting her to be so nervous and forward. When Oliver finds out that she was supposed to be meeting someone, he thinks there will be no harm in pretending to be that date. Except things move fast and they’re leaving the bar to go back to her apartment.
Mia takes charge and it confuses Oliver, but he catches on a little bit after a while. No kissing. She is basically using his dick for enjoyment and he isn’t supposed to move. Except when she says she is done, Oliver asks if he can continue to get her off. So the “just using his penis for research” turned into her having an amazing orgasm and him happily finishing. When Mia says thanks, she will call him if he is chosen, he tells her that he recently got a new number and that they should update it to Oliver’s cell – instead of Ryan’s because she still has no idea. And Oliver still doesn’t know the full understanding on whats going on.
Mia meets the next person for the penis interviews. This time she was a lot less nervous and more professional. So when it came down to actually testing the junk out, she couldn’t do it. All she could think about is “Ryan” aka Oliver. So instead of actually testing it out with her vagina, she just looked at it closely with her hands and eyes.
How is Oliver doing you ask? Well he is wedding cake testing with his fiance.. FIANCE! Whoa dude. Who is this Alexiana Ryland and why are you cheating on her with Mia? Well it turns out that his mother is sick and Alexiana is using that against him. Both their parents wanted them to be together – so after years of friendship he asked her on a date. Then an unexpected unplanned pregnancy happened Alexiana knew that he would have to marry her because what would his sick mother think of a “bastard child”. Although Oliver is pretty sure she isn’t even pregnant. He needs to find a way to get away from this crazy bitch, that he has never loved. Maybe getting this “modeling” job might get her out of his hair for good finally.
The 3rd penis interview is a guy that works at a bar and lives with his parents still. Mia once again can’t sleep with him and only checks out the goods bye view and touch. Kyle may have been good with the ladies – especially MILFS but even though his package was good, it wasn’t as great as the first two. Especially Ryan/Oliver’s.
Option #4 was not any better. Poor guy was so nervous and shy he couldn’t even get it up. Which didn’t really bother Mia. Especially since when meeting up with Chad at the bar, Ryan/Oliver came in and told her he wanted the job and to not leave with #4. When she asked why, he simply said “because I don’t want you sleeping with anyone else”. Yet she still left with Chad – even though nothing happened.
Ryan/Oliver game up the shop to see Mia. Within less than 3 mins they were having mind blowing sex in her office. She definitely could not hire him now. Which leads to finally penis tester #5. It of course went horrible. He thought she was interviewing him for a porno and basically was trying to put on all the corny moves. She pushed him out of her apartment pretty fast, he was way to cocky and gross.
After contest #5 left, Mia sat at her kitchen table going through all the guys profiles. Throwing out everyone except Logan, Kyle and “Ryan”. That’s when she noticed something wasn’t right. The photo’s of Ryan she had did not show a birthmark on his hips. Mia could remember Oliver’s birthmarks exactly. Furious, she went to her nightstand where Oliver left his phone number and that’s where she saw a pen that was not her’s. Engraved on the pen was Oliver’s name. Without really thinking she called him and had him over. The chemistry was amazing again but Mia had a plan and it didn’t involve sleeping with him again but still getting his pants off. Which is where she asked why his pictures did not have the birthmark and called him Oliver.
Oliver apologized and told him the truth – minus being engaged. Mia was upset and kicked him out. She can not see him again nor does she want too. After he left she chose Logan to be the spokesperson.
While Logan is about to sign the paperwork the next day, Oliver shows up at the store. Conversations lead to Bryn wanting to hire 2 guys instead of just 1. Because hello women like variety. Mia doesn’t really like the idea. He lied to her, she can’t keep her hands off of him and he might of weaseled his way into her heart. But two dicks are better than one and they do need to save the store.
Mia had to help both Logan and Oliver make the dildo molds. Everything worked out simple and easy for Logan, but Oliver was a different story. As soon as 90 seconds were done and the mold was off – Mia was attacking Oliver with her body and lips. Once again they have sex at work. But this time Oliver asks her out on a date and she says yes.
Grant their accountant quit leaving a mess involved as well. They already were having money problems but he seemed to have made it worse. Oliver the sweet guy he is offered to help for free until they get up on their feet.
Mia and her family are getting into more and more fights. All her father and sister want from her is to work for the company. Especially with her sister having another baby, they want the father home more. With Mia working for her father that means her brother in law would be home more. Mia could never do that to Bryn or herself.
It was now launch party time. The postcards were sent out and cupcakes were bought. It was an amazing success. The people that came in ate up the men and bought their penis replicas. Even Oliver’s fiance, her family and his came. I bet you’re thinking oh shit. Because oh shit is right. She outed him and called off the wedding. Which is exactly what Oliver already has been trying to do and even told her. So even told her parents and his that she had a miscarriage and there no longer is a baby. Excuse me bitch, you were never pregnant. Mia and Bryn were there to hear it all.
Mia goes to see penis contestant #3 Kyle. She is trying to get Oliver out of her head, except she can’t. Plus it doesn’t help that she finds out that Kyle is really only 19 years old. So they become friends. JUST friends and it’s kind of cute.
Things of course are not the same with Mia and Oliver, but that doesn’t stop him from trying to help. Especially when photos are leaked of Logan having sexual relationships with men. He’s basically taking it everywhere he can. After talking to Logan – they think he was roofed and Mia is pretty sure her father is behind this. Mia is hesitant to let Oliver help, but they both head off to figure out what is going on.
At first they thought that Grant the old accountant was behind this, but surprisingly he wasn’t. Mia still thinks her father is behind this. So she heads home with Oliver to get drunk – I mean they have become friends in the last 24 hours… kinda. They have a run in with Kyle which makes Oliver’s jealously rage very very high.
The next day they head to Classy ‘n’ Sassy late – thanks hangover. Seems like something dramatically has changed since yesterday. Yesterday there were screaming women coming in to get refunds on their Logan dildos. They refuse to be associated with someone so vile and gay. Today on the other hand was busy in a good way. The store was full of gays wanting to buy Logan and Oliver replicas. Seems like Logan went to a gay magazine and they published an article about Logan and the store.
Oliver’s mother hit a turn for the worst and is in the hospital. Mia goes and visits them and meets his mother for the first time. Ginny his mother is sweet and explains to Mia why Oliver lied the whole time. Mia is starting to change her mind about Oliver more and more now. Life is short (eat better pizza. Let’s get Jets. Sorry every time I say life is short I get the Jets Pizza slogan stuck in my head. If you’ve never had or heard of Jets YOU NEED TO GET IT. Unless it’s not available to you and I am sorry).
The person really behind the gay scandal? Alexiana, Oliver’s ex fiance. Apparently she has been banging the yoga instructor who is also bi-sexual and she took the pictures and drugged Logan while he had sex with Chris – the yoga instructor and Grant – the old accountant. Alexiana is also really pregnant this time with Chris’s baby. I don’t need to explain why she did this – I am sure everyone can see in her evil mind why.
Mia and Oliver head back to her apartment to have sex. He is finally forgiven and tells her he loves her. Mia returns it and asks him to move in with her. The next morning they go and visit his mom in the hospital together. His mother is beyond happy and ecstatic that her son is finally happy, in love and will be taken care of. A few minutes later after they speak, his mother passes away in her sleep.
Some time has passed and everyone is doing a lot better. Mia and Oliver are in a committed and happy relationship living together. The store is doing very well and getting better and better. Mia even rekindled her relationship with her father and her sister. Things are going on the up and up. Thank god.